Tuesday 4 October 2016

LYRICS #1

Tuesday 4 October 2016
This is a very rough draft of a song I had in mind so it's open to criticism and changes to improve it. It's based off the idea that Marilyn Monroe had a persona that she put on for her admirers. If she wasn't using this persona, people would often fail to recognize her.

“I’ll never forget the day Marilyn and I were walking around New York City, just having a stroll on a nice day. She loved New York because no one bothered her there like they did in Hollywood, she could put on her plain-jane clothes and no one would notice her. She loved that. So as we we’re walking down Broadway, she turns to me and says ‘Do you want to see me become her?’ I didn’t know what she meant but I just said ‘Yes’- and then I saw it. I don’t know how to explain what she did because it was so very subtle, but she turned something on within herself that was almost like magic. And suddenly cars were slowing and people were turning their heads and stopping to stare. They were recognizing that this was Marilyn Monroe as if she pulled off a mask or something, even though a second ago nobody noticed her. I had never seen anything like it before.” - Amy Greene, wife of Marilyn’s personal photographer Milton Greene

So the song I've drafted here is based off that aspect of Marilyn Monroe's character and personality.

Shall I be her

On my own I am glass
People see right through me
I’m transparent to the world
I worry if I shall ever be loved
If I shall ever be adored
By everyone, anyone or even myself

So shall I be her?
Shall I become that woman?
The one who’s cherished
Who’s oh so precious
Shall I be the diamond of my world?
Shall I be her?

On my own, I’m simply me
A person others fail to see
A shadow you pass on the streets
The last person you’d ever greet
I’m forever lost in the corner of your eye
And for years I’ve always wondered why

So shall I be her?
Shall I become that sweetheart?
The woman who’s a work of art
She humbles who ever she graces
She’s the star with a thousand faces
Shall I become her?

Yes, some will question and wonder
About the girl behind the façade
The girl who is made of glass
She stands behind the goddess of pleasure
Lives in the shadow of the national treasure
But no one asked these questions before I made myself into a show
And no one cared for the girl of glass whilst she was on her own
Because people only want to see the queen, the goddess, the diva
She is the woman that brings love as if it was a fever

So I shall be her!
I shall live as the most loved star of them all
I shall reach the moon whilst I stand this tall
I shall be what others aspire to become
I shall bare jewels that shine brighter than the sun

I shall be her!

6 comments:

  1. Evening Cat - congrats on getting this up here and drafted. As I'm reading, I'm not sure exactly of the rhymes and rhythms - as, for example, the opening verse doesn't have any rhymes or returned-to-sounds - but then in later verses things rhyme more obviously. Are you happy to send over as a .doc so I can take a look from a musicality perspective?

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    Replies
    1. It's just an option, a first draft, we are not ready to have it sent off anywhere just yet. We're still working on it.

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    2. Hey, sorry Phil, this was more meant as a 'premier jet' from Cat. If that's alright we'd like to keep re-discussing and refining it a little more between the two of us before sending it over. Thanks!

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    3. I get that :) I was just going to map out some example verses wherein the rhymes etc are rationalised - just as a guide for structuring further trials. Anyway - I've left some other comments below for you to chew over.

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  2. also - I think the sci-fi b-movie factor needs to feature more overtly, otherwise it's all a bit weird to me that you've got an alien character singing this song. I think that needs to be embraced much more - and I think there maybe a way to do it by interpolating lots of references to b-movie sci-fi about women in particular.

    For example - famous B-movie is 'Attack of the 50ft Woman' ...

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F2cLmbCyzhE

    ... so I can imagine your character singing a line something like

    So I shall be her
    a woman whose image is 50ft tall,
    on the cinema screen in front of you all

    Other b-movies about women include 'Devil Girl From Mars' and 'Fire Maidens From Outer Space' for example...

    So she might sing something like :

    So I shall be her,
    Screen siren - star of stars!
    I'll be their fire maiden!
    I'll be their devil girl from mars!

    I also think - poetic as it is - that the idea of her being made from glass is missing another b-movie trope; if you were to think of her as being 'invisible' - The Invisible Woman starts sounding much more in your territory.

    On my own, I am invisible,
    From everyone else here, I'm quite indivisible
    I am the invisible woman who nobody sees
    or adores or delights in, I can go where I please
    etc...

    For me, there's still a gap between your concept of Norma Green as an actual alien, Norma Green as an alien who is about to assume the role of a superstar, and Norma Green as your Monroe-a-like. Right now, it doesn't matter to be at all that she is an alien - which she most definitely is - and I think you need to have more fun with that concept because in the end, she 'isn't' Monroe and I think you're making a comedic animated short and I think some of that comedy needs to be in the lyrics of the song itself.

    I think, if you were to do some research and gather together all the iconic b-movie women (not forgetting Barbarella!) you could devise a song that suits your sense of her character at this point in her life, but also makes full and fun use of the b-movie setting.

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  3. sorry - typo 'it doesn't matter to *me* at all that she is an alien'.

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